Roca and Erica,
My sentiments exactly. I am finding more and more “inner peace” with honoring my ancestry in a personal way.
Roca, you’re on the money with the reasons for tribal break down.
I used to get funny looks from whites at work and such when they would ask what I am (usually from women). My first thought was to say that I am just like you. A woman. MAde by the Creator. But, I’d say mixed. Boy, the curiosity just grew. LAter, I’d get personal with those who took the time to get to know me. And after this they’d finally say, “What a pretty mix.”
What does it really matter? Initially, I took offense to Linda’s comment about being NDN as “fashionable” I do not relate to that, but I understand what is implied. We beautiful Black NDN’s have no control over how we got to be the way we are, but we are fully intitled to honor and be honored as a part of a People, a nation of people and all their greatness.
When I went to Africa, a man I was having dinner with in his home (w/my soon to be husband) said towards the end of the night out of the blue in a provate moment… “I know the longing you have because of what happened to you. I understand that you do not know who you are.” I felt instantly exposed. Man, somewhere deep inside I felt like crying because until that moment I really could not put my finger on my confusion and disconnectedness. THen he said, “YOu have come home and all of Africa welcomes you.” And boy, some major healing took place. I let go of so much anger towards WHTS. I do not excuse any of their past actions, Only I understand them a bit more. I have not received the same kind of welcoming from American NDNS, at least not yet. This troubles my spirit a bit. It seems that here, one has to “prove” that they belong. And thus, part of me remains orphaned. I’d let it go if it weren’t in my soul; but it is and it has no where to go, so it roams. Searching until it can be found.
It doesn’t matter what the mix is really, but I sure am glad to be here. BLCK, WHT, NDN, and all!!!
Deirdre