- This topic has 7 voices and 10 replies.
-
Posts
-
Good Morning,
Currently, I’ve been experiencing an emotion that I would like to share with you all. Personally, my personality has been affected. How you may ask? Well, when I communicate with some Native Americans, I feel as if I can not be myself at all because I am afraid I will offend SOMEBODY.:confused: I am who I am and I really don’t want to associate with individuals who take everything so personally.
Yes, I will be sensitive to other people feelings but from this day forward, I am not going to totally compromise my personality for others. Don’t they think that I too get offended by certain comments made about my Black Ancestors, etc. as if we are inferior or something. Anyway, thought I would share and was wondering if there are others out there that feel the same way.
Erica
Mant times , but for those that want “you” to fit into thier space, they just need not apply to mine!
I’m with you Erica,
I have never been a “PC” person and have never followed the crowd. But I do take other’s feelings into account and do try to respect their traditions. However, when their actions or feelings are downright offensive to me or my values, or are militant, or prejudicial then I end the relationship. Sometimes people are just ‘spiritual/pshchological’ vampires and you just have to cut them out of your life. I have had to do that in my life on occasion and have been so glad that I did.
The way I feel, I don’t have to prove anything to anybody and if they don’t like me for who I am then they are not true friends. I’m too old and lived too long to tiptoe around someone’s political or prejudicial personality. If all they want to do is take offense at what I might say then are not a real friend.
My philosophy is: Be yourself. Who was it that said, ‘To thine own self be true.’ I once heard a speaker say something like this in defining a good friendship – The test of true friendship isn’t that you can talk for hours and hours. The true test is if you can sit in silence and not feel you have to fill that silence. In other words, you are just happy and comfortable being with each other. Some things do deeper than words.
Well, that’s MHO anyway.
Edited to make my thoughts more clear. 🙂
I want to thank you all for your kind words and support. It’s good to know that there are wonderful people in this world that are there when I need to be uplifted. I thank God for bringing great people into my life.
Erica:D
I agree with Dovelady….I am not a PC person, either and have never been part of the “crowd”. I am who I am….and WASIWUG. I respect other people’s traditions and religions. I don’t let others force me to be anything other than myself. I, too, have had to end relationships when it was draining me of my own energy, or taking away from my family.
That was a real defining point for Ken and I before we decided to get married…that we could be in the same room and not feel it necessary to talk the whole time or keep each other entertained….he could do his thing and I do mine..and then some times we do our thing. He has his agenda some days and I have mine, especially since we both have older mamas, and then there are days when we enjoy sharing a common interest like our cemetery surveying or attending the pow wows and being with our friends.
Always be yourself. To be anything other than that is a lie and takes way too much energy. JMHO…..Becky
1_optimistic wrote: I want to thank you all for your kind words and support. It’s good to know that there are wonderful people in this world that are there when I need to be uplifted. I thank God for bringing great people into my life.
Erica:D
You are loved here Erica and accepted just as you are. I think that is why we are all here. We have all felt like mis-fits with our mixed heritage and we need a safe place to come and feel accepted for who and what we are.
((( Erica )))
Becky,
I agree, it’s better to save your energy for things that are positive and uplifting than to have it drained by someone or something.
Spiritual, social, emotional, or psychological vampires have no place here on Saponi Town. Oh and just incase Bella Lagosie is still around.. no “real” vampires either. LOL
Ok ok. I’ll try to stay on topic next time.
Erica,
This must be my day for talking to you. Today, your topics just seem to catch my eye, lol.
I think those feelings of being afraid of being yourself in another culture is quite common, in ANY culture. Believe me, I understand, in part. I belong in a congregation that has one of the most diverse memberships in the world. And I have also had some weird back-lashes from trying to learn about my Cherokee roots, as well.
It all boils down to “new” people overly-identifying with their newly found roots – and them DEMANDING you play along with their script as well. And if you don’t play along with their script, if you don’t get the terminology down pat instantly, eat what the eat, and are well versed – and obsessively practicing – the old ways perfectly and right off the bat, then you are made to feel like “Satan’s Spawn.” That sounds a bit over the top, but I have found this to be true in the different religious, social and cultural circles I have been in, in my lifetime.
Don’t be like me, getting hurt and isolating yourself, because you don’t follow the script well enough to suit some individuals. You are learning the best you know how, and trying to respect the others that are learning as well.
A wise doctor, now gone to be with the Lord, once told me that I should hang with people that were more like myself, and to stop trying to be like those other people. I think you will find people just as willing to learn about being NA, but just as willing to accept you for who and what you are, willing to agree to disagree and let it be at that.
Good luck in researching your NA roots!!!
Anita B. aka Sparrow
Erica – Give me a ring, sometime! Don’t worry about “other people” knowing who you are in this world is all that we are, and “other people” will try to let things get to you, especially if they know that they can, so live long, my fellow Indian sister, and keep walking and talking YOUR WALK!!!!
Felicia Cegelski wrote: Erica – Give me a ring, sometime! Don’t worry about “other people” knowing who you are in this world is all that we are, and “other people” will try to let things get to you, especially if they know that they can, so live long, my fellow Indian sister, and keep walking and talking YOUR WALK!!!!
Please email me your contact number in a private message. I look forward to chatting with you:D
Erica
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
